It’s been a long few weeks inside my monkey brain. I reached one of my big goals, starting a blog. I’ve been enjoying the accomplishment for a little while now but now it’s time to move on to the next thing on my list. The great thing about goals is that they aren’t an ending point, they’re just a benchmark along the way to the next stop. It’s such a great feeling when you reach your goal and then ride the high for awhile, but then you’re back in your comfort zone again - time to step out☺ For me the anticipation and planning is part of the fun of goal setting. It’s acknowledging what I’ve done, dreaming of the future, of what is possible, and realizing that based on what I just accomplished, I just might be able to do what I’m dreaming of.
I never used to be a goal setter – until I married one. Every year (for 22 years) my husband and I sit down on our anniversary and make our goals for the next year. We don’t always meet them and sometimes we even forget about them but they are always a symbol of learning what makes us happy, trying to be better, and experiencing life. There were times when I really couldn’t see the purpose of goal setting, especially if there was no follow through and no achieving. As I’ve gotten older though I’ve realized that time goes by so fast – your “one day/someday” turns into the next day and the next and before you know it your kids are off to college and you never did start that business, run that marathon, or even take the time to figure out what feeds your soul. For me goal setting became about forward motion.
This week I want to share with you some of the things that work for me when I’m setting my goals. There are times when I don’t quite hit the mark but there are many times that I do and WOW – there is no better feeling of accomplishment, validation, and motivation. Guess what happens when you meet your goal? It leads to an even bigger challenge☺ Start small and then pretty soon it’s GO BIG OR GO HOME.
Here are the first 3 things that I do in setting my goals, give them a try if you think they might help you get started:
- Decide if your goal is a wish or a commitment. In other words, how bad do you want it?
- WHY. Why are you aiming for this goal? To feel healthy? To make enough money to put your kids through college? Your why will determine what your commitment level will be. Trust me, if your why isn’t important enough for you it will be easy to lose your motivation and focus.
- What feelings are you hoping to get by reaching this goal? This is something I learned recently from Danielle LaPorte and her book The Desire Map. It was something that I really connected with, I wish I had known it sooner! We don’t always realize it but what we really value when we reach our goal is the feeling that comes with it. You got that promotion? Maybe you feel powerful, secure, or appreciated. Conquered that challenging single track on your bike? How do you like that feeling of being strong, skilled, and a badass? Nice, right? This also works when you decide what feelings you want to experience before you even set your goal. Then you can check your goal against your desired feelings – is it going to get you there?
Next week I’ll share some tips that work for me in actually working towards my goals. One of the big ones is accountability. It’s so much easier (and fun) for me when I’m not going it alone. That’s where my friends at Marnie Rae come in. I’m not sure how things will shape up technically or logistically but I would love for this community to be a group of women with a few common goals and an amazing network to help each other get there.
One of the ways you can help our friends here with their goals is to comment below and let us know how you set your goals. Do you light a candle, sit down with a journal in your big comfy chair, put a lot of thought and consideration into them and write them down? (This may or may not be me.) Do you reach your pain threshold and just declare “I’ve had enough, this is changing today”? (Yep, me too.) Do you tell your friends or keep it to yourself? I can’t wait to hear your process, I love that we all get to do it in our own way☺